Chapter 7 - THE FIRST VISIT
Lily was seven weeks old when Derek had his first supervised visit.
I almost cancelled.
Legally, I could not simply cancel without cause under the temporary order.
Emotionally, every cell in my body wanted to.
The visit occurred at a family-services center.
One hour.
Professional supervisor.
No private contact with me.
I waited elsewhere.
When Lily returned, she was asleep.
Safe.
The supervisor’s notes said Derek handled her appropriately.
Changed one diaper.
Fed her expressed milk from a bottle.
Cried.
Asked repeatedly whether she was gaining enough weight.
Nothing dangerous.
That should have comforted me.
Instead, I felt confused.
Abusive husband.
Attentive father.
People want those categories to be mutually exclusive.
Sometimes they are not.
The evaluator explained:
“The question is not whether Derek has ever behaved appropriately. It’s whether he can parent safely, consistently, and without using Lily to control you.”
That became the test.
Not perfection.
Pattern.
Derek continued supervised visits.
Most went well.
One did not.
He told the supervisor:
“Emma is keeping our family apart because she’s sick.”
The supervisor stopped him.
“No discussion of adult litigation around the child.”
Lily was an infant.
She could not understand.
But the behavior mattered.
Derek received a warning.
He corrected it.
Again:
Small evidence.
Not transformation.
May you like
Not condemnation.
Pattern over time.
